Monthly Archives: June 2008

Things to do with my Body when I’m Dead

Not that I plan to be dead anytime soon. For god’s sakes, I just spent a fair chunk of change on a new microphone and some more batteries for my video camera. But there are all kinds of things you can plan to do with your corpse after you have shuffled off this mortal coil.

You could get it sent into space for example, for a small fee.

You could have your bones compressed into a diamond.

You could donate your body to the body farm and let scientists measure how you naturally decompose.

You could donate your body to Gunther Von Hagen’s for plasticination and end up being viewed in shows around the world.

Or you could donate your body to science. Which is kind of scary. I mean, who knows what people will do with you.

I’ve weighed all the options, and since burial kinda disturbs me, I’m going with cremation. I wouldn’t want to be a diamond and get lost somewhere along the way. And I definitely would not want to float around for eternity in space.

Did you know they still embalm you for cremation? Kinda weird. Embalming is really bad for the environment. a totally green funeral would be cool, but I’ve never researched it.

I’m not really this morbid, I don’t know why I know so many things you can do with your dead body.

Shyness

I hope people don’t think I’m standoffish, I’m just horribly shy.

It’s a curse. People say kids grow out of shyness, but no, they just grow into adults with different kinds of shyness. My main shyness is terribly cute girls. They can make me turn beet red. I hope I’m not allergic!

I don’t know why I’m so shy around girls. I think it’s a lack of self esteem. I have to rely on my personality here, where as in Vancouver I coasted by on video art fame.

Speaking of videos, my distributor V Tape in Toronto is getting my two new tapes, the revamped Madness In Four Actions, and the humourous and sexy short, You Are A Lesbian Vampire. So festival world, OH PLEEZE invite me to a festival somewhere semi glamourous! I will be oh so grateful to have the chance to travel again.

I’m also realizing I’m missing Vancouver. Not in a way of wanting to move there, but just wanting to visit, to see my old haunts, to visit friends and ex lovers, to go to the nudie beach and look for seals and smoke some reefer. Just a nice BC trip. So I can’t afford it this year, but next year I’m either going to get a show in Vancouver or I’m going to scrape up enough for a proper visit. It is beautiful, and I have some really close friends out there.

My oldest friend, as in the one I’ve been friends with the longest, Laurel, has known me since we were two. I try to keep friends, I do have falling outs, but I can be voted most likely to patch it up and move on. Although I have born grudges for longer than I should. I think I’m over that now.

I’ve grown up a lot since I first moved back to Saskatoon. It’s amazing what being thirty will do for you, it puts everything into perspective. I used to be so gung ho about my career. Then I got diagnosed bipolar and getting recovered took a lot out of me. Now I think I’m really ready to work on my career more. I really am totally career driven, I always have been. That was my zen centre, making videos! The writing, the shooting, the editing, and all those lovely festivals. I need to incorporate it into my life more, and having this camera and computer system is just the ticket. I love being able to shoot when ever I want. and edit whenever I want. It’s amazing that our world has made this possible, for the average person to have their own mini production suite.

And it’s more reliable to have your own camera, you’re not dependent on rental cameras which get beat up fast no matter how careful people are. I had my own camera when I was seventeen. It was my birthday present. It was just a consumer hi 8 camera, with no white balance, but I made like, five videos on that thing. Maybe more!

And this one is my baby. Next to my apartment it’s my favorite thing I’ve gotten this year. The camera I mean. I love having shit.

It would be cool if I got a girlfriend this year, but I have to overcome my horrible shyness. It’s no fun. Bleh.

I get so squirrelly when I see someone cute. dammit!

My cousin Steven got a girlfriend last year after a really long period of no girlfriend. I’m happy for him, he seems happy. He’s turning out nice, I hope.

Anyway, that song up there is Ghosts by Ladytron. and it’s dedicated to all the cute girls I miss out on by being shy.

Update on the homelands video

Well my Grampa’s haplogroup is STILL unknown, but my Gramma turned out to be an H. Not surprising since half the women in Europe are H’s. What is interesting though is that we are ALL, every single human on the planet, descended from one woman in Africa dubbed the mitochondrial Eve. There isn’t one man we’re descended from, but one woman in everyone’s maternal lineage. Pretty cool.

I just finished my vampire video, You Are A Lesbian Vampire. I WAS going to output and stuff tonight, but I left all my new tapes at Mom’s house. SO MAYBE TOMORROW> fucking keyboard!

Tomorrow is house cleaning day, which will be nice I guess, because the house sure needs it. fer sure.

We’re getting ready for the first big shoot week, which is coming up in less than a fortnight. We’re travelling around Grampa’s homelands here in Canada and America. It will be a nice road trip.

Firewire is my friend!

I finally got a firewire and have been busy outputting shot video onto my computer. It’s been a lot of fun! I’m editing my lesbian vampire video as we speak, type, whatever. It’s a voiceover with a heartbeat and then some hot shots of two girls kissing. But I need to throw in a couple more video bits to it, girls kissing cannot carry it all alone, sadly.

I’m trying to give up smoking, but I smoked for pride. I should get back on the patch soon.

I didn’t meet any single girls this pride, though I did meet a lesbian I used to go to high school with. I didn’t know she was a lesbo then.

Pride was nice, we went to the parade and it didn’t rain on us. Mom got me a gay sticker for my bike. We had a hot dog.

Then I partied all night, and now I am still up, musing on my day.

I realy do love making video and shooting and editing it. Its like my favorite thing, even more than drugs!

LOL.

I can’t really write this morning, I just felt bad for not giving my blog a newer post.

I smell something floral.

We waited in line at Divas for 35 minutes before giving up. Ugh! They were full and only taking members first. So we came back here for the rest of our fun.

I love Pride, and there were some very sexy girls there.

But even more than Pride, I love my new firewire cable.