I’m feeling pretty good today. I had to put off my telephone meeting with my Grad Advisor until this past Wednesday, a couple days after Grandma’s funeral. I had some anxiety around it. I’ve been having a little bit of Imposter’s Syndrome in regards to school, which is basically when you think the dummy police are going to burst in at any second and declare you totally incompetent at Grad School. But I didn’t have to worry so much, my Grad Advisor liked my project and gave some really good suggestions for how to take it further. It was really good to hear. And he said I might be eligible for an award, so that’s something to hope for. I also got a grade from one of my last projects in one class and it was an A+ so I hope that keeps my average up. There is one class I was struggling in but it’s actually in two parts and in this one part I am doing really well. So we’ll see.
I’m getting more and more excited about my Major Project because the story is getting more exciting and convoluted in a good way. And I think it might be a thesis project people would actually want to make and go see. So THAT’S good. The theme is really pertinent to current realities in Canada for Indigenous people.
Mom was gonna come back to Toronto with me after Christmas, but I think that plan is changing and now she is gonna come during reading week. We might go to New York for a few days too. Either way, it should be nice.
I applied to a TA position, I whipped up a new CV and a decent cover letter and the best paper I wrote for school this semester as a writing sample. So I hope I get one of the positions. It would really help my anxieties around cash to have a job to ease me through the second semester. And I don’t think there are TA positions during the summer semester, although really I have no idea.
I felt really excited about the future today. Also it helped that we went to the Casino and I won $400. I got 26 free spins on Smoke Signals! I didn’t even know you could get free spins on Smoke Signals!
I think I’m gonna have to get rich on my talents though. Smoke Signals, 649, and Lotto MAX are not gonna come through with my retirement fund! The odds are totally not in my favour! And maybe my film career is also not in my favour, based on discrimination against all my marginalized identities. BUT you never know. You just never know!