Maybe I should get some pepto bismol. I am home sick from work, I went and everything but as I was sitting there doing my job I started feeling REALLY sick, like seconds away from vomiting. So I had to go tell the in charge and go home and I feel bad about it. It seems to be passing, but then it will come back in like waves. Waves of nausea. GRODY!
So I’m home again. Wondering what to do. I have been wearing the patch for about three hours now and no smokes, but I might have ONE last one. I am wondering if I am getting nausea from the patch? I really shouldn’t have one. Dammit!
See, this is what happens when you blog from freely flowing thought, you argue with yourself on live internet.
Okay, I’m having one but I put the rest of the pack in the freezer so I can’t see it on the desk and automatically reach for one. I am smoking it now. I like not smoking, but there’s always this idea that I can have the ideal last cigarette. Whatever that is.
And hopefully I don’t drop dead after my last cigarette. But anyway, here goes.
So far it is like any cigarette I have ever smoked. It is merely average. It is a DuMaurier Distinct King Size. I’ve smoked a lot of different kinds of cigarettes, but this is the brand I smoked primarily, even though it was more expensive and I lived in Vancouver half of my smoking life with no treaty discount. All those taxes. This brand used to be known as DuMaurier Light King Size. They were legally required to change the name because it was alleged that people smoked lights more often because it sounded healthier, when they are all the same in regards to what they do to your body.
I used to really like smoking when I wrote.
One of the problems with my smoking is the ashtray. It often smolders and could possibly start a fire.
It never has, but one of my close friends started a fire with her cigarette. And all the spontaneous combustion cases I have heard of involved a smoker. Like poor Mary Reeser.
My smoke is over, and so is my smoking life. Actually it turned out to be a very nice smoke, because I thought so much about it and wrote this.
I’m looking forward to being a non-smoker. No more gross mouth, no more ashtray. No more smelliness. I never have a girlfriend when I am a smoker. And I’ve smoked on and off for eight years. My last dates were while I wasn’t smoking. There is just something about it, I’m almost certain my pitiful love life has to do with my smoking. And probably the four combined years of recovering from episodes. All in all I’ve been always moving around or not able to be involved for whatever reason. It’s been strange. But I’m still hoping that just by quitting smoking again, I will magically attract non smoking girls.
Right now my stomach feels fine. What if it’s morning sickness?
An interesting fact: Parthenogenesis can happen to a woman all by herself, one egg will somehow (I forget how they explain this works) fertilize another egg from the same woman.
This makes me worry I am knocked up by some fluke egg collision.
Which is hilarious.
Another interesting fact: Since there are only X chromosomes in eggs, the resulting baby would be a girl.
It’s also called Virgin Birth, as I mentioned in the last post, which makes me wonder . . .
If this is what happened to Mary, Jesus must have been a woman.
I don’t know anything about intersexed people and parthenogenesis. So I’m not sure if Jesus could have been intersexed. But that’s possible too I imagine.
So there you go, a female or intersexed Jesus. It boggles the mind. Well, not really.